Weeks have passed, and I have yet to choose between two men. Having a choice isn't something we're generally blessed with, and definitely not after a drought, so I have come to an obvious conclusion.

Why choose? Maybe I'm meant to be entertained by two men. For a change. Maybe it is exactly what is intended by the powers that be.

That being said, I have told each about the other. And because no good deed goes unpunished, this didn't go down exceptionally well. The path to dating is fraught with landmines.

An ample example is, 'You know I date other people right?' which, in your silly little cranium, think is an acceptable if not earnest approach to 'I like you. But I also like someone else as well'.

The package comparison

The first statement is nonchalant, and probably won't snowball into a million interrogational questions. Which will resolutely end up by him asking you how he fares in the package region in comparison (not that I would know.)

The second statement will most certainly have him asking you who the other person is. And frankly you want to keep a little mystery around yourself and the other person. The whole process with dating is getting to know someone slowly, selectively unravelling more, over a solid period of time. Names simply aren't necessary.

However, this news wasn't received as especially well as I thought it would be. A male friend of mine advised me that I should tell neither anything about anything.

But don't people who are dating other people tell the other people?

'The One'?

I suppose they do if they believe there's an ounce of longevity ahead. Which I don't in my rational mind believe there is; however. There's still a shred of romanticism left in me that thinks that honesty will allow you to meet… and I cringe at this: 'The One'.

Yes I still believe that there even might be one out there, no matter how farfetched that seems to me at times. So I certainly said I'm dating other people, and so should he.

The counterproduct of course, is the control.

I'm finally learning to manage how I feel about each man. My focus hasn't been completely obliterated by the lusting and honing in on one man. I truly like them both, and yet I'm not doodling one of their names into a notepad when I'm on a conference call.

I'm starting to, though, over the weeks, like one a little more than the other. Perhaps we have more in common, he's older (makes a change, I love 'em young), and he has an unbelievable flair for the cultured. 'Good Lord he's gay,' says my friend.

Come on. Only I know how ungay he really is, so that's all that matters. Trust me.

What's the solution

So what to do going forward? Analyse it to death, to the point where I get tinitis from all the cogs bashing about between my ears, desperately trying to find a solution as to when to let go of the other one?

No, that's way too much effort; I had the energy for that when I was 26, now not so much.

Nature will take its course as it's meant to — or maybe it won't, but either way I will make a choice when I feel I know a person enough to call him an exclusive 'boyfriend'. No more of this impulsive decision-making when your heart is at stake.

I'll determine the exclusivity when I see fit. And let's face it that may never happen either.

They could walk into a pub tomorrow and fall instantly in love with someone else and I will be a distant memory. I'm almost expecting it. Hell, they may meet each other in a bar and fall in love, never having had gay feelings for the species of the same sex before.

Hopefully that's one landmine I'll never have to detonate.