The myth that the hymen represents virginity is so strong that there's even such a thing as hymen reconstruction surgery which some women will undergo in order to become ?born-again virgins? who vow not to have sex again until they marry. This stems from a religious motivation that promotes that idea that virginity, particularly in women, but in men too, is closer to religious purity.

I can't help but be concerned by how far some will go to return to that mythical ?virginal? state. It indicates an unhealthy perception of sex, as if it is important to ?undo? the sexual relationships you've had in the past because they were in some way dirty.

Sure, your sexuality is yours to do with what you will. I understand that abstinence is in many instances a safer and more responsible option. But demonising the act of sex simply because you feel that it's morally bad is akin to telling human beings to stop breathing. Our libidos are what get us up in the morning and, coupled with a good moral system, sex is an important part of our lives.

Lifeway.com states that only 34 percent of those teenagers who take the purity vow ? that is publically vowing to abstain from sex until marriage ? are "less likely to have sex than those who do not take virginity vows".

What about the 66 percent of youngsters who also took the vow? That's saying that the majority of teens who take the vow to abstain from sex until marriage do not keep it. It also uses the words ?less likely? which seems a non-sequitur to me.

In fact, I find the whole thing somewhat farcical purely for the fact that getting teens to take a vow which they have a more than 66 percent chance of breaking is simply teaching them that it's okay to break a vow and not that it's not okay to have sex before marriage.

Sex is not the enemy. The rate of teen pregnancy and the dangers of unprotected sex are major problems ? but demonising the act and promoting an unrealistic, moralistic code that holds virginity as some sort of ideal to strive for is outdated and unhelpful. We need to allow teens and adults to speak openly to prevent the continuation of a negative cycle. To do this, sex needs to be a normal thing, not something that is frowned upon. Let's get practical and leave those ancient ideas where they belong: in the past.

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