The question of sexual intercourse during pregnancy is one of the first to arise. Both partners are afraid of doing some damage and hurting the growing foetus (baby).

Always remember that the baby develops in the uterus of the woman in the amniotic sac surrounded by amniotic fluid that cushions it from any bumps and knocks.

This means that the foetus is protected from all the movements of the mother as she goes about her day. There are, however, some things that are harmful to the growing baby. Alcohol, smoking, drugs and even medications can cause deformities and retardation and the pregnant woman should be very cautious about what goes into her body. A doctor should always be consulted if there is uncertainty.

It is interesting to note that during pregnancy there are high levels of circulating hormones that can either increase or decrease her sex drive. Many women report that they feel heightened sexual arousal and an increased sex drive during pregnancy. Others report a fluctuating sex drive and still others report little or no interest in sex at all.

Obviously it is important to do what feels most comfortable for a particular woman and to realise that each woman is different as is each pregnancy, even in the same woman. Stories about a pregnant friend's great sex and increased responsiveness should not be used for comparison but rather taken as an individual case which certainly may not apply to all. Most doctors believe that if a woman's pregnancy is progressing normally, there is no reason why she and her partner cannot enjoy sex throughout the pregnancy.

Tiredness and morning sickness, particularly at the beginning and near the end of the pregnancy, may cause a lack of interest in sex. Some women feel that their pregnant bodies are not attractive and feel shy and embarrassed about these changes. This may also be a factor that turns them off sex.

There are some clear medical reasons for avoiding sex during pregnancy. Obviously a history of miscarriages and difficult pregnancy is a reason to abstain. Any bleeding during the pregnancy is a potential problem and sex should be avoided until it is sorted out. Good sexual hygiene should always be practised, especially during pregnancy to avoid vaginal and other infections. Avoidance of multiple partners and the potential for STD goes without saying.

The changing body of the woman should be accommodated during love-making so that she is always comfortable and secure. This may mean changing sexual positions to suit the circumstances.

Couples may experiment with side-by-side positions, rear entry as well as sitting positions to find the one which is most satisfactory. Above all, during pregnancy intimacy should not be lost.

It is possible to continue a warm, loving relationship even if penetrative sexual intercourse is not comfortable or allowed. This should not be a time of separation but a time of intimate togetherness. Cuddling caressing and even oral sex should continue the bonds that existed prior to the pregnancy throughout the 40 exciting weeks of gestation.