You might be facing a tough decision right now: how to break it to your partner that it's time to go your separate ways. It's a time of raw emotion and vulnerability, in short, it can get messy. But it doesn't have to. Make it easier by doing it respectfully and keeping the message clear and you'll be doing your ex and yourself a favour.
Say it to their face
First things first, be brave enough to do it face to face. Sending a text or writing a letter with your intentions is disrespectful and hurtful - two things that won't help you or your partner in the long run. I've heard of people who have even changed their relationship status on Facebook to single without consulting their partner. How is that for cruel?
Worse still is the person who decides to avoid their partner's phone calls and messages until it dawns on them that you may no longer want to see them. Rather look them in the eye and tell them what you want. Doing it this way will also ensure that there is no room for misinterpretation and while it'll most definitely leave the person feeling hurt, it's far better than drawing out the process for longer than is necessary.
In a public place
If you're worried about the scene they'll make, try doing it in a public space. I know what you're thinking - they'll just embarrass you publically, but it's unlikely. In fact, doing it this way - such as out to coffee - will mean the two of your will be forced to talk through the reasons for your failed relationship on neutral ground without letting emotions get the better of you.
Keep it strictly business
Approach it with a business-like attitude, making sure to allow logic and reason to take control. Be clear about your intentions. Don't try and make it sound less harsh than it is. Be respectfully matter of fact. If your partner needs time to process it, then allow for that before launching into the logistics of splitting household items and so on.
Admit your faults
Bear in mind that while you might be angry with your partner, it takes two to tango. Acknowledging that you had a role in the demise of your relationship will help your partner come to terms with the decision.
Be respectful
Leave your partner with their dignity. Taking cheap digs at his penis size or blowjob technique aren't necessary. Treat your ex respectfully during the break-up process.
Cut all ties
Skip the friends bit. No one can be friends successfully as soon as they break up with each other. Rather, agree to sever your ties for now (that includes on social media!) while you both process the change in your lives.
Avoid getting sentimental. Pack away their things and try to get on with your life as soon as possible. It's not good crying every time you see his t-shirt or her perfume. Also, don't keep bringing up your ex when you see your friends. Keep your mouth shut and start focusing on other things in your life.
