For the fourth year running, the FHM crew are charging round the planet in search of the woman for whom men would most happily swap their wife or girlfriend. It's a prestigious, much sought-after title — Anna Kournikova made sure she didn't make it past the first round of any tournament she played in last year, just so as to have enough time to pursue the title. Her time spent online voting for herself clearly paid off; the question now is whether or not she can defend her crown.

It's become a bigger event with each passing year, as votes flow in from the many nations FHM is published in. The 2003 race is now underway, and while the international title is probably out of reach for local talent given the monstrous amount of voting that takes place worldwide, the fact that positions two through 100 are based on each country's individual voting means that the South African list will have its fair share of home grown beauties.

Two of them are sitting across from me. Nina Wassing made her name in Egoli, although if I'm not mistaken she was also featured in FHM as an unknown beauty before she burst onto television. She's also a former drama classmate of mine; she was always streets ahead of the rest of us at being a squirrel, or an anxious tree, or melancholy, or all the other ridiculous things we had to do when we should have been practising romantic scenes and gunfights and other cool, important stuff.

The other member of last year's list is Dominique Donner, the mouth-watering triathlete whose stock goes through the roof in my book when she confides that a bottle of red wine the night before a race works wonders. To think I've been trying a dozen beers all this time. I manage to talk her into giving me her number; only afterwards do I discover that her boyfriend is a major nightclub owner, meaning I'm likely to be resting peacefully at the bottom of Table Bay come the end of the weekend.

Dashing to the airport and flying to South America to live under an assumed name seems to be the only option, but before I head off for Bolivia, there's time to catch up with one or two other luminaries lapping up the lunch.

Marcus Brewster is back in his office job following Pop Idols, and part of that job is running publicity for FHM. Judging by the success the magazine is enjoying, he's not doing too much wrong, but it hasn't stopped him from preparing for his next big adventure — Idols II. This time round Marcus will be singing with the contestants, which should make it all the more entertaining.

The other pleasant surprise is getting to sit alongside Greek '80's lingerie model Helen Constantine, who still cuts an alluring figure despite her advancing years. She also has an appetite for red wine Percy Sonn would be proud of, and proves great entertainment. By the time I finally leave, she and Marcus are performing a Carpenters duet on the Blaauklippen lawn, watched by the few remaining guests and a couple of bemused German tourists.

I'm off to cast my vote; Margaret Thatcher got it last year, but I have a sneaking suspicion that 2003 could be Helen's year.

Online voting for the FHM 100 Sexiest Women in the World is open — go to www.fhm.com to have your say.

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